i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
