Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
