I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
