Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
don't judge my taste in strippers
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
