I wish I could punch you in the face.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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