dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
