So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
