Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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