C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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