When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
