Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
