brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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