If that was your dad, he is hot
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Randomize
