I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
