it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
