bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
