i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
