FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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