dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I just want nice things and good sex
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
