Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
