My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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