her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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