i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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