How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
