you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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