I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
