All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I just googled if crying burns calories
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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