yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
