did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
