I puked a lego.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
