Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
