I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
The uberlube is also flammable
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
