You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
