so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Randomize
