I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
