How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
