Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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