You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Randomize
