You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Terrible idea I love it
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
