If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
