found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
