brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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