I need help removing her.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
