I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
