i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
