I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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