Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
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