I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
