please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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