If that was your dad, he is hot
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
